Feed 'em Dogpoop Swimming in Hot Sauce! They Won't Know the Difference.

by Joan E Thurman

Congratulations, Jackass. You ate fire.

Honey'd Wings offer a civilized alternative to the fire-breathing discomfort of hot chicken-wing recipes. Have you ever observed the archetype macho-man as he shows off to his frat brothers by choking down an order of super-extra-spicy "Devil's Spit" wings? He goes red in the face, the sweat begins to pour off of him, he can't even speak for a while--and everybody knows he's not enjoying his wings, he's just proving that he can eat anything.

Why not simply offer your spice-seeking show-off a turd on a plate? I doubt that he'd know the difference if you molded feces into little chicken-wing shapes, baked them and doused them thoroughly with the hottest sauce you can find.

Your dog can provide wings for Fire-boy!

Then Macho-man can establish himself as the boldest eater, and the rest of your company can enjoy themselves--because nobody in their right mind would even touch the infernally hot wings offered up as rites of passage! 

That's no way to do a chicken, sisters--strictly for immature show-offs. People of culture don't necessarily want to scorch their pallet with too much spice--so neither should you. 

My honey'd wings are a crowd pleaser, because everybody can enjoy them. And you won't find this variety of wings in the frozen food case at the grocery store either. They're different, they're not overpowering, and if you're in the mood for a little naughty fun, you can always tell guests wondering what is that different flavor? that what they're tasting is the natural tang of bat wings--aren't they yummy?

Honey'd Wings

Ingredients:

• 2 lbs. fresh chicken wings
• 1 stick of butter
• 1 cup of honey
• 1/2 cup salad mustard (the common, yellow stuff)
• 3 tsp. curry powder
• 1 tsp. salt
• 1/2 tsp. MSG

To Prepare:

1. Cut the wings in half, and discard the wing-tips.

Preheat the oven to 300 degrees.

Honey'd Wings

Ingredients:

• 2 lbs. fresh chicken wings
• 1 stick of butter
• 1 cup of honey
• 1/2 cup salad mustard (the common, yellow stuff)
• 3 tsp. curry powder
• 1 tsp. salt
• 1/2 tsp. MSG

To Prepare:

Cut the wings in half, and discard the wing-tips.

Preheat the oven to 300 degrees.

1. Melt the stick of butter in a small saucepan.
2. Remove the pan from the heat, and add the remaining ingredients (except the cut chicken).
3. Whisk the pan contents until thoroughly blended and frothy.
4. Using tongs, dip and saturate each piece of chicken in the mixture, then arrange the wings in a single layer on a cookie sheet or other large, flat baking pan.
5. Bake the chicken for as long as possible without burning--a minimum of two hours
6. Generously baste the pieces as the mixture crystalize on the baking wings, several times
7. Turn the pieces over every 40 minutes.
8. Serve hot or cold

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